Two things happened yesterday of note. Well probably more than that, but two that I am going to share with you know.
1. I went to a Weight Watchers meeting and weighed in and got the ball officially rolling for what I hope to be a road to a healthier me.
It was strange sitting in that meeting. I've gone to them before and often used humor (often self-deprecating) and hiding in the back of the room as my defenses of choice. The desire to crack a few jokes certainly came in to play a few times, but I have to say I feel engaged and interested in how people make it work. (According to #WW words that describe foods that *MAY* be bad for you include - Au Gratin, Fried, Crispy, etc. REALLY #WW? Fried food is BAD for me? LOL) (P.S. Unfortunately that list does include some of my very favorite food words...Au Gratin....mmmmmm)
Maybe it was seeing people slink in after the holidays that gave me some comfort too. This is a long process. I'll be slinking sometime very soon, but the important part is to slink. It was comforting too, to see the number I'm starting with and realize it was a few small pounds lighter than I expected. Not good by any stretch, but not my heaviest. And that I will take!
2. During my church program last night a Kindergartener came up to me, grabbed my mom-belly belly fat with both hands and said loudly "You're Fat!"
I have to admit, I am never sure how to respond to things like that. I know how I would respond to my OWN child, but I'm his mom and can tell him exactly how rude and hurtful words can be - when said to myself or others. But I never know how to respond when it is another child, particularly one who I am supposed to be teaching, mentoring and looking after in a church program. (Sadly, similar things have happened like this before.)
And here is the thing, the kid is speaking the truth. I am fat. I know that, everyone knows it. It is an observable fact. Kids are taught to tell the truth, and often are known for pointing out the obvious. But it is hard to have the moment of realizing that it IS true. It does hurt.
Now why do I bring up these two stories together?
There have been times in my life when either of these events would send me straight for my two friends Ben and Jerry. Weigh ins are traumatic when you are this big. Meetings in the face of the success of others can be challenging when you are struggling. Insensitivity and hurtful words, especially the true ones, can be embarrassing and shaming.
But yesterday instead I ate the points I was allotted. Filled up on water and veggies and said to myself, "I got this." And just this second I do. So someone remind me of THIS when I maybe reach a place where I don't.
Yes. I am fat. But I'm working on being fit instead. And so long as I am working on it, it cannot fully define me.
P.S. Though parents? Be sure to teach your kids that just because something is true doesn't mean it needs to be said. MmmmKay?