Monday, July 05, 2010

What a week.

Please stop the ride - I want off.

I'm breaking my unintentional blog silence finally.  Did you miss me?  Or maybe you didn't even notice.  Either way, life has been a roller coaster lately, with lots of extreme dips and sharp turns.

VBS was followed by a quick trip to Chicago for a friend's wedding, an 80th birthday party with my Gramma, and a long drive broken up by baby goat's first train ride in the Dells.  The trip was a whirlwind and fun.  We all had a slight cold but didn't think too much of it, after all baby goat was still on steroids and antibiotics from his hospitalization the week earlier.

Monday we went about our business.  I had most of the day off so I meet a friend for lunch and did a few errands before heading over to daycare for their summer ice cream social.  It was fun and baby goat was running around like mad.  When we got home that night for dinner though I noticed he had a slight cough, but it was productive so I neb'ed him and put him to bed.  (I put Mr. Goat to bed too since he had the same cold and was feeling lousy).

But baby goat didn't get much sleep that night, and I got even less, as he began coughing and coughing more and more.  By 2am it was clear that his cough was no longer productive and we wouldn't be going to daycare the next day.  Still I got him nebulized and down for a bit more sleep.  By 6am he was up sobbing and coughing again, by 7am he was retracting seriously and it was clear that it was now a question of clinic or ER as soon as I could in the morning.  I neb'ed him again and he improved somewhat so we made a morning clinic appt.  We needed a neb again at 9am before we left.  By our 10:15am appt he needed one again. 

We know now that if he needs one any sooner than 4 hrs that it is time for us to be at the doctor, but during the morning it still seemed reasonable to wait for the clinic and not head to the ER.  The clinic ped took one listen to him and his history and told me "He sounds like a squeaky toy, you are headed to Children's by ambulance" and left to start the proceedings.

Luckily his O2 was good and another neb and a dose of steroids made him plenty stable for the ambulance.  Still I felt like a lousy mom to be following my son wheeling out on a gurney bed to the ambulance.  The rest of the day was spent in the ER and then getting admitted.  He got a lot of steroids and neb's to get his wheezing under control but for the most part he was doing fine.  He did have a minor fit when 1:30 rolled around and we were still in the ER and he hadn't had any lunch.  The kid knows when he has missed a meal!

The nice thing about being at Children's is that we were finally with the specialists who could do tests to help determine causes of these continual breathing issues and also who could help us with a long term care plan.  The next two days were full of nebulizers, blood draws, barium-feeding swallow studies, pulmonologists and a plethora of lovely nurses.

For the first two days he was on "droplet care" in case he had pneumonia (even though his x-ray didn't really show signs of it) so everyone had to robe/mask up to come into the room.  Baby goat began feeling better quickly, although it did take a while to increase the time between neb doses.  He was charming to almost all the staff and I was led to believe that he was exceedingly well behaved for a 16 month old trapped in a crib in a hospital room tied to an O2 meter.

I didn't end up going into work last week.  I slept in his room two nights and missed at least two very important meetings but we were in the right place for baby goat.

We were finally discharged Thursday evening with no conclusive results - or rather a lot of maybes.

For example:
We are still waiting on allergy results but we know that he was NOT having an allergic reaction at the time.
Reflux can aggravate asthma but he shows no signs of food/liquid aspiration regularly.
Prematurity, a mom with preeclampsia and being a boy can all lead to slightly smaller airways which can help trigger asthma but can be grown out of.
There seem to be no anatomy or diseases that contribute to his breathing issues.

So basically - baby goat gets colds that trigger asthma that can get very bad very fast.

And even now they can only really "guess" that it is asthma he has.

Still we are operating as if he does.  We went to asthma class and he's begun a controller med.  It can be a fight but hopefully it will keep us out of the hospital and off of some steroids for a while.  I think poor baby goat has been on 10+ doses of steroids since Jan, and it was only getting worse.  Hopefully we now have some knowledge to get ahead of it because if we don't we could end up right back in the hospital at any time.

It was hard to see him back in the hospital.  On the one hand I realize that the hospital doesn't mean I need to freak out - his 46 days in the NICU taught me that, on the other hand I had so hoped we'd be beyond that for him.  The hospital is never fun and while he's well cared for I just want him to be healthy and runnign around like every other kid.  I don't like the fact that it still could be MY preeclampsia that is causing his health issues.  It gets me every time I think of it.

We spent this holiday weekend cooped up mostly, recovering, administering meds and catching up on work.  He did get to see Grandma Goat during the week when she came up to help with errand and such, and he and Mr. Goat went to the zoo with my parents on Sun.  He's doing so much better it is easy to forget that he can get so sick so quickly.

This tale isn't over, and there is a whole mess of unbloggableness that continue to make my life stressful right now but we are over the corner.  Baby goat is doing well and that, above anything, is the most important thing.  He is my baby and I will do anything to keep him safe, well and happy.

(I missed a lot of planned stuff from last week - baby goat's first train ride, his 16 month birthday, my 5 yr bloggiversary, and more so hopefully I can get back to some of those things.  I hope you are still out there and thank you to all who followed us on facebook or twitter last week and had so many prayers and good wishes for baby goat.)

11 comments:

Valerie said...

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: Y'all are always in our thoughts and prayers. Please let us know if you need anything. We love y'all!

fritzfacts said...

Liz,

I am so glad that he is feeling better,even if it is only full of maybe's. Hopefully the preventive medicine will do it's trick. Boo has illness asthma, so I know how scary that can be and how fast it can turn.

I hope you all get a much needed break!!

JM said...

Yikes! Glad that you are all doing okay now. I hope you all get some answers soon that help you to better manage Baby Goat's reactions. Hopefully things start to slow down as well.

Melissa said...

One of my friends daughter had similar problems her first 2.5 years. The called it reactive airway and every single time she got sick she would end up in the hospital. The good news is (and the only reason I am sharing) is that at age 5 she has completely grown out of it, doesn't even get nebs anymore. I think it started getting better around 3?

I'm sorry your going through this and will pray for you, kids aren't meant to be in a hospital {{{HUGS}}}

Suzi said...

very scary for sure, but glad he's on the mend. Poor guy. I hope he stays well for a long time--you guys too!

DaisyGal said...

oh wow!!! I am so sorry about Baby Goat and that week of hellishness..

I am so glad he is ok but not having any answers just stinks.

JUST hug him...lots and lots of em...and take one for you. Hoping both of you are feeling better soon.

P.S ..YOU ARE AN INCREDIBLE MOM!!!!!

Heather of the EO said...

Oh lady, I feel for you. I know. I really know. Asher has spent much time at the hospital, and I wish that wasn't the case for either of our sweet ones.

And then I saw on twitter it was a really rough day yesterday too. I'm sorry, lady.

Peace to you and yours.

edh said...

Hang in there, Liz... I hope B.G. feels much better very soon and that you can get some rest!

trishatfox said...

First of all we're gonna stop with the 'maybe my preclampsia did this' mind set right now!! I totally get the instinct. We're worried. We want to blame someone. Blaming ourselves...easiest target in town, right? But, the truth is we don't know what's behind this. We may never know. It seems like virtually every kid in America has asthma right now. Likely there are a combination of factors at work.
IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.
Say it: IT'S NOT MY FAULT.
Even if the preclampsia is one of many,many factors, it's not like you chose to have the condition.
Your baby is a beautiful combination of your traits and your husband's. Long after he outgrows all of this he'll carry your intelligence, your sense of humor, your grace and your deep spirit. Now that you can take credit for.
In the meantime, you are taking excellent care of your boy. Children's Hospital is an a-maz-ing place. You're in good hands.
Here is my prayer for you:
Most Good and Gracious God, help Baby Goat breath. Fill his precious little lungs with good, clean air just as you fill us all with your loving spirit. Be with his care providers. We ask that you guide the doctors and nurses to make sound decisions and to act with compassion. Be with, oh Lord, Liz and her husband. They are exhausted. Sad. And overwhelmed. Help them find strength in their faith in you. Help them find rest and comfort during their vigil over their son. Help them remember that you are with them through every moment of this trying time.
We thank you for your steadfast love. We thank you for Baby Goat. We thank you for Liz. She is a bright light among us. We thank you for Children's Hospital, where we can be confident of good care. We thank you the nurses are working. We thank you that among the fear there are blessings. And there is much hope.
We pray in the name of your Son, Jesus Christ. Amen.

Rebecca said...

Oh, how scary for you guys! I'll continue to think of all three of you.

The Marketing Mama said...

you have had a HELLA week, my friend. Hang in there... I know it's tough. I'm here for you - xoxo