I can't thank you enough for all the kind words. That people have cared enough to drop me a note letting me know that they think I'm special has really be a wonderful source of joy for me this week. Things are still hard at work, seemingly impossibly hard but I'm pushing through. At this point I can only do my work and do my best to prepare for the possibility of leaving my church. Nevertheless, the fact that so many people are supportive of me makes me confident that it will all work out for the best.
I've been spending very little time in the gym lately and need to get back to some sort of routine there but other than that my life seems to be shaping up into something more orderly than it had been for a while. My husband is home consumed with one major task - find someone who wants to employee him as a lawyer. If you know of anything let me know ;) The house is getting cleaner as we've both been able to spend a bit of time digging through piles that added up swiftly in the past months of VBS, camps, job stress and, oh yeah, that pesky bar exam. Simply the appearance of some more shelf space, clean floors and such is a tonic for me. I know I don't clean as much as I'd like but I really do love it when things seem orderly. It makes me want to keep up the work.
In work news I have nearly finished my draft of complaints with this process for the powers of be at church. That in and of itself helped me wrap my head around the sheer "wrongness" of this whole ordeal. (Sidebar - is this an acceptable form of quotation marks? See this blog, which is Anguished Corn's blog of the day.) Writing this letter combined with the looks of shock from staff members when I tell them about this thing and at least one member saying they would leave the church if I went have at least boosted my ego enough to know that all of this does not represent the whole church and for that I'm grateful.
There is a big non-church event this weekend which will have many many church members there. I imagine that it will be a difficult and yet hopefully enlightening event. I also an upcoming meeting with my committee that should provide some input to this whole thing too. But ultimately whatever happens I just want to do my best in it.
It helps that I realized just now that in a week we'll be driving to Milwaukee spend a long weekend with my oldest friend and her family. Yay!
So we are pushing forward, thankfully the best direction. I can't thank you for all your care and concern. I'm always one to invest emotionally in my job and my performance and it has been extrodinarily helpful to know that the opinion of my boss is not held by those who know me.