Thursday, February 22, 2007

Why is it that only the complainers take time to comment?

It was my turn to look through the survey's from a recent family education event, where we asked about various children's ministry, confirmation and adult ed opportunities. One "delightful" person wrote this:

Leadership needs to be stronger in [children's ministry]. Also experience with children is a must. It is hard to lead if you don't have children or experience with children.

Now I realize that it is true that I don't actually have children (and thank you for pointing out such an obvious flaw in my character), but clearly I wouldn't have been hired if I didn't have experience with children. I mean, I know that this is most likely from a family doing nothing to help the situation and who is content to complain. But I don't think that anyone who has seen me interact with children thinks that I lack experience. Of all my flaws I really don't think that is my main one.

(And what does this mean for our Youth Pastor who is single in his mid 30s with no kids...but maybe the same doesn't apply to men.)

Now I'm all paranoid...are people out to get me? Several others referred to the previous children's director fondly and others expressed the need for more adult volunteers (HELLO? why doesn't anyone say yes when I ask then. Do you think I don't know that?!). Sometimes ministry is just so catty and cruel. I know it is a random act of hatred and I shouldn't take it too seriously but I'm getting really sick of having to exude positivity while parents refuse to take responsibility and blame me instead.

I'm going to go home and cry now, and possibly eat ice cream. I guess I'll have to come in tomorrow and finish the rest of the work on my desk but I just can't get it done right now.


Tiffany said...

You are wonderful with children. I have seen you with mine and you are great. Try and let it roll off your back. This is one parent. Sometimes people just need something to complain about. You are right. If they are so intent on complaining, maybe they should help offer solutions to their concerns instead of just complaining about it. I love you and would entrust my children to you any day.

liz said...

Awww, I'm sorry you're down about this. Try not to let her get to you. I know it's easy for me to say, but every job comes with this kind of thing... every person in a leadership role is vulnerable to criticism, and it definitely stings sometimes. I'm sure you are fabulous with children and wouldn't have gotten the job if you weren't! I hope today is a better day. :)

Monkeymama said...

That's a pain. It's too bad that the happy people aren't as likely to comment - it's a trend that I noticed when I was teaching too.

Hot Cup Lutheran said...

augggggh! People can be so stupid... remember you simply have a different perspective and a different experience and different eyes through which to see things! What a HUGE gift to the families you minister to! Trust in the gifts God has given you and trust that this parent or parent(s) were having a bad day.

Emilie said...

Oh, what a downer. Just remember that people who try to put you down are doing it (most likely) because they are small and insecure and need to bring others down to their level. Please don't let them get to you. And if you need someone to vouch for your rapport with babies, give them my number.